I sometimes get asked who I would like to meet

Anyone in history, alive or dead

Since my mind is very orderly and linear

I followed a systematic approach

and asked some people who THEY would want to meet

Mostly people looked at me funny and kept on walking

But I got a few suggestions from people

none of them were right for me

George Washington? No thanks.

Albert Einstein? He might be cool to meet

but I don't think it would be a very interesting conversation

Plus my German is terrible

Adolf Hitler? Many people want to meet him and see if they could kill him.

No dice. For starters, that would screw up the space-time continuum.

But more importantly, he's not someone that I WANT to meet

and this is about people I want to meet

If I did meet him, it would be more of a duty or an obligation (to kill him)

John Lennon? Most accounts are pretty clear

on the fact that John Lennon was an asshole

Of course, he himself often said he was an asshole

so he was probably right.

Jesus Christ? Nope.

If I met Jesus, it would be just so I could tell my friends that I hung out with Jesus.

A few problems with this

Jesus obviously didn't speak English

How would we communicate - charades?

Poor guy had nails in his hands

Plus, this particular choice of meeting anyone, dead or alive, doesn't apply to fictional characters.

If it did, I'd have to start considering Philip Marlowe, Legolas from Lord of the Rings, any of the A-Team, Minnie Mouse, et cetera'

Better to limit it to real people

I don't have any dead relatives that I feel like digging up

metaphorically

After running around in circles and getting nowhere

I decided that after considering all these long-dead people

the person I would most like to meet is Michael Jackson

Am I a fan of his music? No, not particularly.

But to sit down in my living room with some coffee, and maybe some biscotti

I am a good host, after all

and Michael Jackson, I bet that would be really interesting

So I'd like to meet Michael Jackson, because I bet he has some awesome stories

but he's all kooky too, so I'd have to come prepared with a lot of questions.

But I think that would be really cool.